Double Meaning SMS

Mjhe toh news waali aunty se darr lagne laga
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Kehti hai:

Jo sb chhupaate hai hum vahi dikhaate hai.

Tauba Tauba

Aaj ke time me privacy naam ki cheej hi ni reh gai.

How do u teach a blonde maths?
U subtract her chlothes
Devide her legs
And square root her.

Ques. What is the difference between a pregnant woman and a light bulb?

Ans. U can unscrew a light bulb.

He took me from a bar. He took me in his car. He took my top off. He puts his lips on mine, but don't worry: I'm a bottle of wine!